| The shoulder aches |
[Dec. 5th, 2009|11:25 pm] |
Sigh, sometimes i really hate how my mind works. First you see, okay. Then you see again, you like. Then when you like, you want to see more. After you see more, you start to hear things. The more things you hear, the worse it gets for you. All those things that I had wished will happen were just a figment of my imagination.
"Many men want to bingbing her", why are they ALWAYS popular straight poo yings?
After all those, you want to stop the liking, to save yourself some heartache
but the heart does not want to.
dejavu i say. |
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| Herald Sun Nov 27 2009 Friday ("Driver ruined my life" - Elissa Hunt) |
[Dec. 2nd, 2009|01:54 pm] |
"I remember 18, that first year I saw myself as a man.
I remember running for my country, the first time I represented Australia.
I broke my personal best that day. I remember fainting at the end of the race.
I remember feeling tall, strong, healthy.
Now I feel weak.
I know fear now, doubt, isolation, anxiety, fear of death, loss of hope.
I know hospitals, doctors, medicines; I know these are my partners in life now.
I was awarded $350,000 to replace the $2.5million I would have earned in my working life that was cut short. I feel cheated.
I would cut off both my legs to be a father, that's the sacrifice I would make.
I saw myself in the mirror the other morning. I barely recognised the body I saw. I don't like my body now, it doesn't work. It's fat, ugly, I can't feel it.
The fear of death visits me every day.
Every time my weakened body succumbs to a new infection, I wonder if this is the one that will end it. I think about dying a lot these days.
I remember that 18-year-old. As I am hoisted out of my chair into my bed, I struggle to think those memories were ever of me.
I don't just remember what I lost, I see it, experience it, many times a day.
I feel it every time a support worker tells me of their life, of going to a party, going to the footy.
I find myself watching as they walk out my gate, and get on with their life.
I envy them. And I am left alone to remember what I have lost."
-Justin Stevenson
Treasure everything u have, and everyone around u now. Anything could be lost within a split second, and then it would be too late. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 29th, 2009|11:42 pm] |
your beautiful face makes my heart go aflutter
i could see you everyday and be your butler
if you would let me into your heart
oh dear lord that would be some good luck!
(damn, watching Mr.Deeds made me alot cornier than i already am!) |
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| Very unlucky day. |
[Nov. 25th, 2009|12:17 am] |
My bloody wallet and SG mobile phone was stolen today at work.
Wallet consists of all the usual cards which takes a freaking longgggg time to replace. Bank took freaking 20mins to connect my call so that i can freeze the card, driver licence requires a credit card for replacement but my card's frozen, how to use?!?! medicare needs the medicare card number[written on the card itself] to log on the website to report loss, HOW RETARDED IS THAT ZOMG I JUST REALISED!!???
And there was probably only maximum AUD75dollars and SGD50dollars in the wallet, you poor thing, fcukwit.
Then the SG mobile phone, the one i carry with me every single day wherever i go regardless whether theres an sms or not, just so that i wouldnt miss a text from you. The mobile phone that stores my very first sim card, where i still have a sms or 2 dated all the way back in year 2000. My source of connection from sg, and you fcukwit took it away! you cant even use it idiot, it's password protected so once its switched off, u wouldnt be able to use it. PLUS i cancelled the connection in sg so the sim card can no longer be used, which means u'll have to take the card out to use the phone. and what happens when u take the sim card out? the phone switches off! congratulations fcukwit, you poor thing!
just for that few freaking dollars, you cause me so much trouble, i've had that birthday wallet for years, it had a hole in it but i couldnt bear to change it.
i miss my phone and wallet :o(
yup so we left the back door open today as usual, boss opened it bigger than usual coz we were doing rebonding and she wanted ventilation, i was pretty happy with the air circulation after both front and back doors were open today. i put my phone on the usual spot, on the ledge next to my lunch bag n keys. my wallet was carelessly put in the side pocket of my bag, i didnt zip it coz i had to take it out twice to get some stuffs[my fault, really.] if ive zipped it, the fcukwit would only have taken the phone and boss's wallet. at 5:30pm i was eating some yoghurt and i remembered checking my phone for messages. THEN, haircuts came in and i became busy till 6:45pm, went to toilet to clear bowels and came out 6:55pm ready to leave. took my belongings, walked to front of salon, wanted to take wallet out so that i can buy Imperial fish on the way home and realised i couldnt find me wallet.
Thought perhaps it dropped onto the shelf coz i didnt put it in properly, went to check shelves and bag again a couple of times before it dawned on me someone had pinched it. THEN i realised, OMG my phone is missing too, ZOMG someone stole them. Told boss, she checked her bag and realised her wallet got stolen too.
FARRRRRRRRR OUT man i tell you, so annoying.
then i rang the police, took them freaking 45mins to ring me back and told me they cant come around now because all the vans and in use, they havent got a van to come to the salon.
WTH.................
so she gave me a choice of doing the statement over the phone or wait for the next available van, which when i asked how long its going to take, she kept saying she doesnt know, she really cant predict when they'll be free because something else might pop up again and then they'll have to go to that somewhere
WTF....................
seriously, if half the population is attempting murder at the other half of the population at the same time, what are they going to do?! half is being kind, im thinking not even 1/4.
so anyhow, because i managed to freeze my credit card and managed to get mum to ring M1 to cancel my sim card, theres nothing else i can do but to sit and wait hoping that the fcukwit will throw me wallet on the ground somewhere, some other kind soul picks it up, sees my address/phone number and contacts me with the wallet and my identification cards.
i was feeling pretty low then, chan mai-mee dahng [i have no money], seriously so i wanted to go see me eye candy and hopefully lift my spirits abit. but after driving all the way there, she wasnt around! how unlucky is that? now u know how shitty it is for me today, sighhhh. im just glad i did a really nice cut + colour for Mink today, ego booster. didnt exactly have a nice night last night either, dreamt i had a bald patch at the back of my head. aiyarhhhh, hopefully larb gai, seafood noodle salad and chicken cashew nuts tomorrow will lift my spirits =/
oh yes btw, i hope you win the lottery tonight[i just bought the ticket this morning!] so that u will stop stealing and causing agony to innocent people. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 21st, 2009|10:08 pm] |
My mum's funny.
Shes decided to buy another furniture, sofabed to be precise but my brother not really agreeing to it, saying too many furnitures, too cluttered, no one use.
So now my mum's sitting on the sofa in games room and then my brother came back up, saw her and asked what shes doing,
Mum: "you said no one sit so i sit lor" |
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| Saturday |
[Sep. 20th, 2009|11:31 pm] |
I absolutely love having you around, always brings out a smile from within me.
Please visit me more often, I'll save my leaves for you! :D |
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| Classic bicycles. |
[Sep. 6th, 2009|08:58 pm] |
SO i finally went to the classic bicycle shop to see the bicycles and i must say they look goood. However, being short as hell as i am and kiasee cyclist who must have one feet on the ground when gettin on the bike and when sitting on the bike, i can only get on the 20" bikes because the 22" are abit high for me to hop on when stationary. BUT, i find the 20" looks abit petite and im afraid my body would look too big for the bike. SO, should i risk falling over + comfort for loooks, or should i practice moving off without the need of having my bum on the seat and one foot on the ground because the guy at the shop said he couldnt hop on his bikes when its stationary too as the seat is high, he just starts off standing. if i can master the skill of starting off standing, i'll be able to get the 22", which looks chunkier.
SO, should i get this 20"
or this 22"
or this 22" [which i really like but unfortunately it's higher than the previous 22" as this is a mens bike and the previous 2 are ladies bike]
howwww????
btw, ignore the baskets, theyre all extras. bikes are $680 each, baskets are additional 35, lights additional 60 or something so im looking at a total of about 800 for the bicycle excluding helmets. they sell cool classic helmets too im so going for it haha |
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| DFO essendon |
[Sep. 1st, 2009|10:48 pm] |
omg, i seriously dont know how girls do it, I shopped for almost 3hours today looking for black clothes for work and have only gone 3/4 round of DFO Essendon when i tak boleh tahan shopping, shop until want to puke clothes that kind. SO i gave up and quickly glanced through the last few shops before heading off. Also, because i was so sick of shopping, i just wanted to go home, even though i was supposed to go check out the classic bicycle shop in st.kilda and head to richmond to buy packets of yummy nestle hot choc. In the end i gave up those 2 errands as i was running late as well, and headed to preston to buy flowers for me vase which has been sitting on the dining table for the past 2 months empty.
Guess i'll have to postpone the visit to bike shop till a later date, hoping theyre open on sunday too coz i'd be nearer, and i really really really really wanna get a bike as soon as possible.
p/s: i was very well on target for my $200 shopping budget today, spent $199.75 unwittingly although i didnt get to buy moisturizer =/ and bra heehee |
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| bicycles, what say you? |
[Aug. 26th, 2009|11:33 pm] |
Should i get this one
or this one?
theyre about 700 each though, without accessories, lights look about 50-75bucks, i want a basket infront and a carrier at the back woohoo im SO checking out the shop this tuesday! :o))))))) |
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| Bicycles. |
[Aug. 26th, 2009|11:10 pm] |
I have decided to buy a bicycle so that i can cycle to the train station rather than driving. Its a good workout, saves petrol and saves stress on looking for a carpark space.
She has searched australian websites + ebay but the type of retro bicycles they have is a tad different from what she wants. The ones they have here that are similar to what are want is what they call a Ladies Bike and she finds its a little too feminine, no ooomph! for her. In times of desperation, she has decided to turn to website from china in order to search the kind of bicycle she wants and viola first picture she googled showed many cyclists on the road and guess what? most of them have the EXACT bicycle she wants
Horror of all horrors, where can I find youuuuu??? [at an affordable rate please]
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| FLying |
[Aug. 25th, 2009|10:39 pm] |
This is ridiculous, return ticket for SQ in feb 2010 costs SGD$900 but one way ticket from SIN to MEL in feb2010 is SGD$812
thats madddddddd, obviously i'll take return, or maybe go budget again but im having problems syncing my return dates with the flight times and date coz i need to book 2 separate flights sin-perth-mel damnnn. Might end up doing a 16hr stopover at perth airport oh noooooo =/
then again, maybe im not going home :o(
oh wells, at least C is more or less confirmed coming in 3 weeks! woos, gonna go Costco at Docklands with her, can't wait to see what its like! |
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| where is my Imperial fish? |
[Aug. 25th, 2009|01:05 pm] |
I is having a very bad Imperial fish withdrawal symptom
i need imperial fishhhhhhhhhhhhhhh :o( |
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| the break |
[Aug. 13th, 2009|11:07 pm] |
I havent done cardio for 5 consecutive days in order to sleep more, and it is a spot on cure for my sleepy spells at work in the afternoons.
Dilemma.....
howhowhow?
C told me she might be coming next month wooohoooo certainly looking forward to it but i REALLY dont know how to take a day off from work :o( |
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| Happy birthday! |
[Aug. 9th, 2009|10:31 pm] |
Was watching NDP 2009 on slingbox just now, its like so near yet so far.
I want to breathe the same air
feel the same humidity
I want to watch the fireworks with you
see your face again
hear your voice
I want to go back home.
I am proudly Singaporean. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 3rd, 2009|11:05 pm] |
Would you pay AUD$1000 for a goose down quilt?
but it looks really fluffy and warm and comfortable and everything i wanted! :o(
shall start saving to buy it for next year's winter.
anyway today's the kind of day where i finally understood what you meant when you say you feel like a mess.
bad hair day,
clothes mismatched,
woke late so couldnt do much cardio/weights,
no eyecandy on the train at all PLUS
ham n cheese toast couldnt par up with the tomato + cheese toast i had last week
i.dont.like.it.period.
and of course, you were in a bad mood too
i.just.dont.like.it.period.period
however, managed to pick my mood up by doing some grocery shopping at Laurimar town centre after work just now, burst my budget though, but its alright, im proud of myself for being able to put back the junk/un-needed stuffs from my trolley onto the displays before heading to check-out, so everything i spent on was healthy and needed :o) |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 27th, 2009|11:49 pm] |
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Wishing so much to see your face again. |
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